Saving Face

Thais believe strongly in the concept of saving face, which is to avoid confrontation in order to not embarrass themselves or other people. Therefore, they do not bring up negative topics in conversation and don’t express firm convictions or opinions. For a farang, this can be frustrating. You try to connect with someone and ask what they think and how they feel, they will most likely agree with you and smile and try not to answer. Agreement and harmony are considered to be the most important social etiquette. Thais avoid confrontations. Losing your temper causes a loss of face for everyone.

Minor embarrassments, like tripping, might cause Thais surrounding you to giggle. In this case, they are not mocking you, but helping you save face by laughing it off. All this takes some getting used to!

There is also a sense of status and class in Thai culture. As a teacher, my students may act very different towards me than they would in Canada! Students are taught not to speak during class and expected to agree with their teachers at all times. When I was helping a Ying, a 18 year old Thai girl with her English homework the other day, I kept asking her if she wanted to take a break, if she wanted to stop, and she would always ask what I wanted to do or agree with me. We ended up studying for 3 hours when I realised we wouldn’t stop until I said so!

Still a Farang

Sure, you’re told it shouldn’t be taken as offensive when Thais call you farang. But walking down the street and hearing them talk about you (because you can understand when they say farang!) is still odd. I can’t imagine a group of Canadians seeing an Asian walking down the street and calling him a foreigner! “Hey! Look at the foreigner!”. So I try to think of nice things they can be saying... Aren’t we lucky farangs visit our country? This farang girl seems nice? One day I have to say hello and ask where she comes from?

Everything here has a farang price and a local price. Sure, I guess I can afford to pay the farang price... But I live here now, and won’t earn a farang salary! One could argue it still is a farang salary. My answer is that I couldn’t live with that amount of money in farang land!!! Period.

There are several reasons why people strive to become fluent in the local language when they go to work in a foreign country. To me, not only is it about respecting my adoptive country, it’s also by fear of being left out of conversations when it’s getting interesting and or not making real friendships because I will always be the tourist, the outsider. And also by finally being able to understand what they are saying about the farang walking down the street!

I like the feeling of locals being impressed by my few Thai words, and laughing at the way I pronounce them. But for now, it’s not enough, not very satisfying. I want to take lessons, but I’m a bit of a coward. Plus I can’t afford it at the moment, which is a great excuse. Then I will start to work and will make lack of time my excuse. But I still practice with my CD and book, and say as much as I can in Thai when I go to the market, the shops, the restaurants…

So I’m still a farang, and always will be. But an important note to self : instead of getting quiet when embarrassed, Thais giggle. This causes them trouble with Westerners, who are always sure they are being made fun of. Mai Pen Rai... Keeping a “cold heart” in Thai custom is definitely helping me! (I will describe Mai Pen Rai in a future post!)

Spirit Houses

For many Thais, spirits are a part of their daily lives. These spirits, Phis, can be both good and bad. Therefore, every building logically needs its spirit house : homes, farms, offices, government buildings, even night clubs. Otherwise, where would the good spirit reside? To avoid trouble, a spirit must live in its own house, and not in the real house. That means the spirit house, which usually sits on top of a pole, must be comfortable and not stand in the shadow of the main structure. In big cities like Bangkok, the spirit house often ends up on the roof! If the main house is enlarged, so is the spirit house. Only fair! They are very pretty and look like a doll house. They are usually covered in food, flowers and different offerings. Even though this is a bit of a funny tradition for the Western eye, I must admit I was happy to see the big spirit house outside my apartment (see photo below)! The spirits ought to be happy!!

The Spirit's House

Our apartment building, the spirit house on the left

Contradictions

Phuket is often talked about as being paradise, but once enchantment has worn off, you begin to wonder about modern Thailand. How have decades of tourism, American GIs and loads of money affected the Thais? Has capitalism corrupted them? Have they lost themselves in greed?

Despite the dreamy postcards, all the grace of Thailand cannot disguise the truth about tourism – a lot more foreign men visit Thailand than women. Sex is one of the main tourist attractions in Thailand. Patong does, indeed, resemble a sexual supermarket : discos, go-go bars, massage parlors... “Thailand is the playground for the world’s frustrated men” (Ian Buruma). Walking down Bangla road, you see a display of drag queens, lady boys, prostitutes, strippers... and amused tourists. This openly direct sexuality is so different from daily life, so absurd, it almost isn’t obscene. It is like a cartoon, almost makes you laugh because it’s so outrageous. It’s a show for the farangs, a fake world set up to make money. It is confusing, because while all this industry takes in the cash, Thais are also deeply concerned about their image, about “not loosing face”. To hide this side of Thai tourism and its bad image, another image is presented to the world : the ancient Thai culture. There appears to be a contradiction between the image of the Land of smiles, its delicate tropical flowers and unique hospitality, and the world of live ping-pong shows. But then again, both coexist. The same girl dancing on the bars on Soi Bangla will donate part of her earnings to a Buddhist monk the next morning, to earn merit. Her culture outside the bar is amulets around her neck, images of Thai Kings and Buddha. “The apparent ease with which Thais appear able to adopt different forms, to swim in and out of seemingly contradictory worlds, is not proof of a lack of cultural identity, nor is the circus of Patong proof of Thai corruption – on the contrary, it reflects the corrupted taste of Westerners, for whom it is specifically designed.” (Ian Buruma). Maybe!

The Western liberalism embraced by the Thai sex industry is very unrepresentative of the majority of Thai attitude to the body. The lack of clothing worn by tourists bothers Thais. Baring your flesh on beaches is very much a Western practice. When Thais go swimming, they often do so fully clothed so they find topless bathing distasteful. No Spanish beaches here!

Thai women dress very conservatively, usually with long sleeved shirts and long pants. In fact, they are very concerned about being protected by the sun. They wear long hats or scarves. They do not want to tan. They often wear whitening creams or very thick sunscreen on their faces.

Nothing is black or white, nothing is so simple. And economically, a young Thai woman can earn a phenomenal amount of money selling her body : more in a couple of years than her parents earn in a lifetime.

Different countries, same argument, same consequences...

Our border run to Penang, Malaysia

Border runs are part of the journey of any traveler who wishes to extend their 30-day tourist visa in Thailand. If you are in southern Thailand like us, you have two choices - go to Ranong, Myanmar (around 1500 baht) and get a 15 day extension or go to Penang, Malaysia and get 60 days (around 4000 baht). If you come by plane, you will automatically get 30 days, so that's another option for those who can afford it! Two weeks ago, we went to Myanmar. I was waiting for my employer to get together all the paper work I needed in order to ask for a Non Immigrant B Visa. When they provided me with it, I was ready to go to Malaysia.We left at 21:30 by mini bus and drove all night. There was only 6 of us in the van which was nice - last time, when we went to Myanmar, the bus was full with 12 passengers. Early morning we woke up to cross the border and eat breakfast. After exiting Thailand and entering Malaysia, we went to the embassy and left our passport there so they could arrange our visas. We arrived at our hotel in Penang, Malaysia, around 10:00 in the morning. We rested until lunch, at 12:00. After that, we had all afternoon and evening to ourselves. We really enjoyed visiting Penang. We visited a few of its beautiful temples.We walked around little India (I was very tempted to by a Sari but restrained myself).

We watched an interesting show outside one of the temples.

We visited a Mosque too.

This is what I had to wear in the Mosque. The material is so thick, it doesn't breathe at all and I became very hot and sweaty in a couple of minutes (the smile didn't last!)

Chris in the Mosque.And then went for dinner. Because this wasn't included in our border run package, we walked around quite a bit before deciding where we wanted to eat. We selected a restaurant which had typical Malaysian food, which felt like the smartest thing to do. When we sat down, we got offered tea and peanuts while we were making our decision. We selected two meals (crispy noodles with shrimp and sweet and sour pork). We asked and they said the rice was included with the pork dish. The noodles were quite disappointing, but the meat was nice. After eating, we received our bill. It was shocking! They charged us for the tea, the peanuts, the rice, added tax and tip! We didn't even have enough money on us to pay the bill! It was frustrating! We ended up leaving all we had and walked out, feeling like we had been ripped off. Without any more money (I'm exaggerating, we could've changed some bahts into Malaysian riggits but we had just spent so much we didn't want to spend anymore!) we simply went back to the hotel room and called it a day!!

The next morning, we had breakfast, checked out, had lunch and we left around 12:30. We went to the embassy first where everyone received their passport with visa stamp. We drove all day until 18:00 when we stopped for dinner. We were dropped off at our apartment around 23:00, very happy to be home and to have our visa permitting us to stay a little longer in the Land of smiles.

Food

Thai food is full of flavors, a blend of the spicy, the subtle, the sweet and sour, and is meant to be equally satisfying to eye, nose and palate. A proper Thai meal should consist of a soup, a curry dish with condiments, a dip with accompanying fish and vegetables. There must be a harmony of tastes and textures within dishes and the entire meal. You should eat with chopsticks and spoon, the food being cut in small enough pieces to forbid the use of knives.

Thai cuisine doesn't have very specific breakfast dishes. Very often, a Thai breakfast can consist of the same dishes which are also eaten for lunch or dinner. Fried rice, noodle soups and steamed rice with something simple such as an omelette, fried pork or chicken, are commonly sold from street stalls as a quick take-out.

The following dishes tend to be eaten only for breakfast:

Chok - a rice porridge very commonly eaten in Thailand for breakfast.

Khao khai chiao - an omelet with white rice, often eaten with a chili sauce and slices of cucumber.
Khao tom - a Thai style rice soup, usually with pork, chicken or shrimp.
Phrik nam pla is served with nearly every meal. It is fish sauce with fresh chillies. Fish sauce is a staple ingredient in Thai cuisine.Here’s an overview of some popular dishes.

Tom yam - hot & sour soup with meat and coconut milk.

Khao phat - One of the most common dishes in Thailand, fried rice, Thai style. Usually with chicken, beef, shrimp, or pork.




Pad Thai - a dish of stir-fried rice noodles with eggs, fish sauce, tamarind juice, red chilli pepper, plus any combination of bean sprouts, shrimp, chicken, or tofu, garnished with crushed peanuts, coriander and lime. Pad Thai is one of Thailand's national dishes.



Curries
The major ingredients of Thai curries are fresh herbs. A simple Thai curry paste consists of dried chilies, shallots and shrimp paste. More complex curries include garlic, galangal, coriander roots, lemon grass, kefir lime peel and peppercorns. Here's three popular ones.

Kaeng matsaman or Massaman curry - an Indian style curry, usually made by Thai-Muslims, of stewed beef and containing roasted dried spices, such as coriander seed. It contains potatoes.

Kaeng khiao wan or Green curry - a coconut curry made with fresh green chillies and flavoured with Thai basil, and chicken or fish meatballs. This dish can be one of the spiciest of Thai curries.
Kaeng phet (lit. 'spicy curry') or Red curry - a coconut curry made with copious amounts of dried red chillies in the curry paste.
Som tam (green papaya salad) - a spicy green papaya salad with dried shrimps, tomatoes, green beans and peanuts. I tried it once and got food poisoning because the vegetables were probably soaked in tap water before hand. I was in bed for 48 hours, so I won’t be eating any of this again!




Desserts

Khao niao mamuang - My favorite : sticky rice cooked in sweetened thick coconut milk, served with slices of ripe mango.



Drinks
Alcoholic beverages from Thailand include Mekhong whiskey and Sang Som (also called whiskey even though it's a rhum).

Several brands of beer are brewed in Thailand, the two biggest brands being Singha and Chang.

Yummy treats

Certain insects are also eaten in Thailand, especially in the North. Many markets in Thailand feature stalls which sell deep-fried grasshoppers, crickets, bee larvae, silkworm, ant eggs. Interesting.

And let's not forget toads, found at any local markets!

Before


After


Bon appétit!!

Thai Massage Mae Ow Ka?

I had two Thai massages so far – surprisingly only two, considering the amount of massage parlors and how cheap they are (cheapest in Patong being 200 baht an hour, approx. 6,50$). Most Thai massages take place with little privacy on a thin hard mattress on the floor, aligned with dozens more, only separated by a thin curtain. The process can be summarized as being “gently” bent, pressed and squeezed by barefoot masseurs. I heard that Thai massage traditions go back twenty centuries, conferring the same beneficence on the giver as the receiver. It is based on the theory that invisible lines of force run through the body. Muscles are worked and released, after a slow loosening. Another technique involves cutting off the circulation entirely in one area for a minute. There’s also some pinching and light hits, harder to describe. Movements and stretches are always gradual so you wind up in crazy positions without much strain. It’s astonishing how much pressure the masseuse can apply! At times, you feel like she weighs as much as a truck. It feels like a very thorough engine tune-up more than a massage!!! After the feet and legs, she works her way up to your back, arms, shoulders, and finally the head and face. It was disarming at first when my masseuse started a lively conversation with the masseuse two feet away. I thought I was supposed to relax? Nonetheless, I left invigorated and a bit groggy, feeling like I had been reborn. It is definitely an experience I will repeat as soon as I get my first paycheque!

Employment Update

Good news!

I am hired at HeadStart International School (www.headstartphuket.com). I will have my 2nd grade class in September, alongside an assistant to help me in the classroom! From what I observed the assistant whisks around the class to remind students to pay attention and to help those who don't understand. So helpful! Plus the classes don't have more than 18 students!

The school is close enough for me to take the local bus every day. I will be teaching English, Math, Science, History and Geography. The school has specialists for Arts, Technology, Thai, Mandarin and Physical Education. It seems like I will have many free periods to correct and plan which sounds great! The schedule is from 8:30 to 15:30, but the teachers have to be there from 8:00 to 16:30. There's another 2nd grade class and I think the other teacher is Canadian as well, so it will be nice having someone to plan with!

The interview process was quite long and stressful. I did feel like they dragged me around a bit too much, but now that I'm hired (verbally for now, hopefully I will sign the contract soon). In a nutshell, I first went to the school and met with the principal for the first interview. Then I went to observe a 3rd grade class on Monday, and went back on Wednesday to do a teaching demonstration (English and Math class). It went very well and the principal who evaluated me said he was impressed but he was waiting for the other principal to come back from holiday the following Monday to confirm everything. Then they asked me to come in again for another interview. I talked to the three principals - headmasters for about 30 minutes. They asked me the classic questions about my philosophy on education, my management skills, etc. It all went well, but I was crushed when they said they would call me back in one week. I made it clear I was hoping to hear back from them as soon as possible... and then I got back home and received a phone call with an offer!!!! They should sort out my visa too, but in the mean time we had to do a border run because our 30 days visa was expired!

So everything is looking up! In a few days we will start looking for long-term accommodation which should go easier than the first time, because we now have a few contacts!

The King

You see him everywhere in golden frames! I do mean everywhere : every single restaurant or store has a picture of him, not to mention the billboards around town. Most Thais are fanatic royalists, and you risk offense if you speak of the King without due respect. Unlike some of his predecessors, who murdered their way to the throne, King Bhumibol seems to deserve adulation. According to a book I read, "He is an attractive, high-profile figure, who spends a lot of time helicoptering around the remote regions of the kingdom, setting up the Royal Projects one encounters everywhere: irrigation projects, hydro-electric schemes, schoolhouses, medical centers, temple restoration, road construction, etc." He seems to be a blend of tradition and modernity, and the people love him! His face is shown on every single paper bill and coin.

Buddhist Monks

Traditionally, a young man approaching adulthood enrolls in the community of monks, the sangha, for anywhere from one to three months – although in many cases he will remain a monk for several years as he pursues his education. Many will even return to the wats (wat = Buddhist temple and grounds) once in a while throughout adulthood.

They rise at 4 o’clock daily to being their strictly regimented day. After the morning bath, the monks leave at sunrise in groups to collect food and offerings from around the community. They wear orange robes called phikkhu. They shave their heads and eyebrows. You see them walk around town and many people donate food to them. By 7:30, the monks return to the temple for breakfast. This will be their only meal of the day. No one eats between midday and breakfast the following morning.

Monks are venerated in Thai society. They set the standard of behavior in the community. It’s believed that by serving, housing or feeding a monk, a person gains merit that will elevate his social standing in future incarnations.

Fun fact – I was walking around Patong with Chris when we came across a monk sitting in some sort of tuk tuk. We smiled at him. He did the wai, then he blessed me with holy water!! (aka he threw a cold liquid at me and I assumed I was blessed and it was holy water he threw at me!). It was a first!

The Wai

Thais very rarely shake hands. Instead, they use the wai to greet and say goodbye, or to acknowledge respect, gratitude or apology. It’s a prayer-like gesture made with raised hands, and it changes according to the relative status of the two people involved. Thais instantly know which wai to use when, but for us farangs, we do our best to imitate the wai received! I was taught that placing the hands close to the chest with the fingertips below the chin is the safest way to go : the stranger’s wai. For an example, see Ronald McDonald and myself doing the wai!

Farangs

The word farang is actually a Thai derivation from ‘français’ although I always thought it was derived from ‘foreign’... Maybe it’s both! It is used to describe any fair-skinned, round-eyed foreigner from Europe or the USA. According to Thai tradition, the farang comes from a far away land called the muang nauk, the ‘outside kingdom’. For a laugh, let me copy you part of a chronicle, the Thai Nya Phuum, who sums up the concept as follows : ‘They are exceedingly tall, hairy and evil-smelling. They school their children long and devote their lives to the amassing of riches. Their woman, though large and round, are very beautiful. They do not grow rice’. What do you think? Pretty fair description! Although I believe we now smell better as a population than when this was written!

When a Thai calls you farang, it is not pejorative. But they are still amused by our customs and will often look at you with a grin when you do things differently (like eating with chopsticks, they find that amusing!).

Day and Night in Patong

I have been putting off writing because it's hard to get my head around what to say about Patong. It is loud, it is flashy... Sometimes it's amusing, sometimes it's heartbreaking : the beggars, the sellers, the Thai massages, the tuk-tuks, the prostitution, the smell of petrol and fish...

We spent one night out and we enjoyed it. Met nice people and had a good laugh. But that was it for our nightlife. Everything's is a bit too much here. Wherever you walk people are trying to sell you things, to shake your hand, the get you inside their shop...

The rain falls are impressive : violent, sudden, destructive. No umbrella will protect you from it! You either jump in the storm and expect coming out soaking wet or hide somewhere until it stops.

You can get anything here, but everything has a price. I am already tired of eating rice, getting other food is expensive. We pack up on fruits from the market and leave it in our fridge for when we're in need of refreshment : mangoes, papayas, melons, bananas, lychees, dragon fruit...

Today I had an interview at HeadStart International School in Phuket. It went great and they offered me a very well paid position. The school is awesome, very small, very clean and new. The classes are no bigger than 16 students! The only problem is they follow the British school year and I would only start 16th August. I don't know if I can afford waiting that long without employment... I will have to weigh my options now!

Speak later for more news!

Patong

Sawatdee Ka!

After spending two nights in Phuket town, we realized there wasn't much more we wanted to do there. Plus, we weren't successful with the job search. We woke up around 6am this morning, had a last tour of the city and market before checking out and jumping on a local bus. We are now in Patong, which is very touristic and loud, but our first view of the coast was very exciting. The beach is surrounded by mountains and the view is spectacular. It is the monsoon season (rainy season) and it has rained a lot, especially today, but the view of the beach itself - clouds or not, makes us very happy!

We are resting in our great hotel (Tiger Inn), slightly cheaper than the previous one (and so much nicer!!) and getting mentally ready for the night ahead. The nightlife here should be crazy, a lot of go-go girls and flashy bars. I don't know how long we will be entertained, but seeing it for the first time promises a lot!

We are taking the weekend off : apart from sending some emails, updating our profiles on job search engine and checking the Phuket Gazette for vacancies, we will get our bearings, relax and start job searching again on Monday!

Laana ka!

We have both landed safe and sound!

It started out bad as soon as I got to Ottawa airport : my flight had been canceled. Continental Airline rerouted me through Air Canada, who had higher restrictions concerning flying me to Thailand without a return ticket. I knew that the Thais wouldn’t make any fuss about it, but apparently the Canadians were. So they made me buy a return ticket and promised me it was refundable. My new route was Ottawa-Frankfurt-Delhi-Bangkok-Phuket.

I was not able to sleep one second on the 1st flight so I was a bit grumpy in Frankfurt airport. Happily, the plane going to Dehli (Air Asia) was nearly empty and the big comfy seats made up for any lack of comfort on the Air Canada flight. I probably slept 5 of the 7 hour flight. I was in good shape in Delhi airport, and loved looking at the beautiful saran’s worn by the Indian women. I had to wait a few hours there. I sat beside an Indian couple on my flight to Bangkok. I barely slept there either cause we didn’t have much space and I kept receiving elbow hits from my neighbour.

Landing in Bangkok was very exciting – probably the most excited I had been until then because of the lack of sleep. I am a very ashamed to admit it, but with the excitement, I actually left my ‘purse’ on the plane, with my passport and Thai Baht. Needless to say I thought I started my trip as a stupid farang. I met a lovely Thai security man and he was very kind in helping me. I noticed very quickly that I had forgotten it and some passengers were still exiting the plane. We found it quite easily and I was surprised to see everything was still in it! It hadn't left my seat. After the security guard reassured me that I wasn’t a stupid farang and that it can happen to anyone (to be stupid) he let me jump the line to cross customs right away, not without leaving me his business card with his email address so I could ‘tell him if I got the job’. My first encounter with Thai people was great!
I was relieved to see my backpack arrive with the rest of the luggage. Few! I then proceeded to check-in my flight from BKK to Phuket and waited for Chris, who arrived about 30 minutes later! It was great to finally be with him. All his flights went as planned and he says the food was amazing (first thing he told me!!

We were both very tired on our last flight (from Bangkok to Phuket) but it was only over an hour. Landing was great as we got to see the coast, many beautiful islands and the clear water.... breathtaking!

We had booked two nights in a small hotel in Phuket Town called Talang Guest House which isn’t bad. My first impression of the town is that it’s a lot poorer and dirtier than I had imagined, but this goes with Phuket town reputation. There are too many cockroaches on the street if you ask me, but I guess it can’t be worse than living with them in Spain! We weren’t planning on staying here long anyway, but I ate my first pad thai and it was very nice.

Our plan for tomorrow is to go around the work agencies and see what they say about teaching jobs. We would like to get half-sorted before traveling around. It’s night time here and 30oc so I am already scared for tomorrow! Hopefully I will feel more rested and ready to live in this heat!
Speak soon!

4 dodos!

Chris is in England enjoying some time with his family and friends. I am at home with my family and getting ready to leave! All the vaccines are done and packing is nearly over!

I had a telephone interview to teach at Songkla University in Phuket! The interviewer was very friendly and honest enough to tell me the university wasn't offering a very high salary and that I would get much better offers once I am in person in Phuket. It was kind of flattering (and surprising) to have a job offer to teach at university level, but I know I will be much happier teaching kids... plus I have read everywhere not to accept a job offer from abroad so I will wait 'til I'm there to make any decision!

Preparation

Only 2 weeks to departure!

Here are the news so far...
Julie will be travelling for nearly 27 hours from Ottawa to Bangkok, landing at 6:55 am.
Chris will be departing from London and arriving in Bangkok at 7:50 am.
Because of the recent political turmoil, we have decided to skip Bangkok altogether, and upon arrival, we will be hopping on yet another plane directly from Bangkok airport to Phuket, down southern Thailand. Hopefully, this will be the safer option! We are keeping an eye on the developments and it looks like things are stable in most parts of the country. Southern Thailand seems safe!

We have been in contact with different schools and agencies in Thailand, but we are waiting to be there before making any commitment.

Right now, we are focused on moving out of our Montreal appartment and enjoying our last days in Quebec!